2019: Post Week 1 NFL Top Five

We’re back!

Our first Monday Night Football game of the season ended on a 58 yard field goal; that’s a good enough indication that this could be a fun year.

Our first Sunday Night Football game of the season…I don’t want to talk about it.

Top Five was interesting for this week. First, it’s Week 1, so I have no idea how to truly gauge how good a team is. Second, after the Top 2, where the hell do you go?

Honorable Mention – Baltimore Ravens

I can’t write this post without at least making mention of the Ravens. However, they’re not good enough to be a Top Five team by doing it to the Dolphins.

I was pretty high on the Ravens this week and thought Lamar Jackson could do something special against a poor run defense. I mean, I wasn’t technically wrong.

Dude can ball, and apparently he can throw too. Fun fact that I will mention time and time again – Lamar Jackson is exactly four days younger than I am. There he is playing football and here I am sitting in a library writing about him.

What a loser.

Number Five – Philadelphia Eagles

First half wasn’t pretty but the Eagles showed they’re still a legit football team.

Carson Wentz had some good numbers largely thanks to the production of DeSean Jackson. Altogether, offense looked good and defense has some work to do.

Ultimately No. 3-5 in this list had non-convincing wins. The Eagles’ win was to the lesser of the three and it was at home, so here they sit at five.

They’ve got a trip to Atlanta coming in Week 2 that could potentially give some fits. Atlanta didn’t look great in Week 1, but again, it’s Week 1.

The NFC East could be pretty fun this year because how bout dem Cowboys, eh?

Number Four – New Orleans Saints

Will Lutz THA GOD?!

Nothing real surprising to point out from this game other than Will Lutz having a leg of gold. Brees, Kamara, Thomas, they all played well.

The reason I put the Saints at four instead of three is because the win came at home whereas the Rams’ win came on the road. Good thing for the Saints is they play the Rams this week, so literally just win that game and climb up a spot.

Number Three – Los Angeles Rams

I thought the Rams were at a big risk of starting the season 0-1, so them pulling out the dub also contributes to them being the highest non-Patriots/Chiefs team.

Jared Goff was very not-good but luckily Cam Newton was the same way. Credit Malcolm Brown for some quality carries (and two house calls) to take the load off Gurley. The defense wasn’t great, but the defense was also going against Christian McCaffrey.

Again, the Rams and Saints match up this week. I’m really excited for that.

Number Two – Kansas City Chiefs

In 60 seconds we saw how psychotic Myles Jack is and how screwed the Chiefs are if Mahomes ever suffers a significant injury.

Luckily, he did not. Unluckily, Tyreek Hill did. Sammy Watkins stepped up big in his absence but it’ll be interesting to see if he’s able to sustain that success with Hill gone. Elsewhere, Shady made his presence felt in the run game for the new team.

The Chiefs have Oakland this week. I have a sneaky suspicion they’ll be able to sober the high the Raiders are on after a big Monday night win.

Number One – New England Patriots


The Patriots looked really good. I’m not sure if you knew this or not, but Antonio Brown is actually joining the team this week. I know, pretty poor coverage on that front; I had no idea.

There’s not much else you can say other than utter dominance and the Steelers lacking big time without its two former stars.

The Patriots will likely be at the top of these rankings for a while.

Next Five Games
at Miami
vs New York Jets
at Buffalo
at Washington
vs New York Giants

That’s disgusting.

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